Living Presence
SowSee Summary
About the Book
In Living Presence, Kabir Edmund Helminski introduces readers to the spiritual path as a training system that awakens mindfulness and connects us to our essential self. He explores the concept of “presence”—a conscious state where human beings remember God and transcend their mundane concerns. This presence allows individuals to unlock their latent potential, harmonize their inner and outer lives, and live with intention and love.
Helminski emphasizes that this book is not about theoretical spirituality but a guide for transformative practice. It bridges the teachings of traditional tassawuf with the challenges and opportunities of modern life, offering a framework for readers to rediscover the sacred in every aspect of existence.
About the Author
Kabir Edmund Helminski is a teacher, author, and translator known for his works on Rumi and Islamic spirituality. A Shaikh in the Mevlevi tradition, he has dedicated his life to making the universal teachings of Sufism accessible to a global audience.
Insight 1: The Practice of Presence
Imagine walking through your day as if your mind were an open window. Everything that happens—the warmth of the sun on your skin, the sharp words of a colleague, the quiet rhythm of your breath—is simply passing through. You’re aware of it all, but not overwhelmed by any of it. This is presence, a state of conscious awareness that anchors you to the divine while grounding you in the here and now.
Kabir Helminski frames presence as more than mindfulness; it’s a spiritual practice, an act of remembrance that connects you to God. It’s not just about noticing what’s happening but recognizing the sacredness within it. When you cultivate presence, you’re not just living—you’re aligning yourself with a higher reality.
But presence isn’t automatic. You have to practice it, cultivate it like a gardener tending to delicate plants. This begins with attention. What are you focused on? Where does your mind wander? In a world designed to distract you—emails, notifications, advertisements—your ability to reclaim your attention is a revolutionary act. Every moment spent in true presence is a moment of resistance against a culture that thrives on scattering your mind.
Islamic spirituality offers a framework for cultivating this state. Take ablution, for example. You might think of it as a mechanical act before prayer, but it’s much more. When done with presence, it becomes a cleansing ritual that prepares not just your body, but your heart and mind. Feel the coolness of the water on your hands. Imagine washing away not just dirt but the day’s distractions, your frustrations, your fears.
Then there’s prayer, the cornerstone of presence in Islam. Each movement, each word, is designed to bring you back to the moment, back to God. When you stand in prayer, you’re not just reciting verses—you’re declaring your intention to focus on what truly matters. When you bow, you’re physically and spiritually surrendering. Each gesture is a reminder: Be here now. Remember God now.
But presence isn’t confined to rituals. It’s something you carry into every interaction. When you’re with a friend, are you really with them, or is your mind elsewhere? When you’re eating a meal, do you taste the food, or are you scrolling through your phone? These moments seem trivial, but they are the building blocks of a life infused with presence.
Here’s the beauty of it: presence transforms the ordinary into the extraordinary. A simple conversation becomes a chance to connect deeply. A walk in the park becomes a communion with creation. Even mundane tasks—washing dishes, driving to work—become acts of worship when done with full awareness.
“Presence signifies the quality of consciously being here… It determines the degree of our alertness, openness, and warmth.”
Helminski reminds you that presence is a way of honoring the divine. To be present is to acknowledge that every moment is a gift, a chance to remember who you are and why you’re here. Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) exemplified this in his life. He was fully present with the people around him, whether listening to their concerns, leading them in prayer, or walking through the streets of Medina. His presence made others feel seen, heard, and valued.
This is the power of presence—it’s not just for you; it’s for everyone you meet. When you’re present, you bring a sense of calm and clarity to your relationships. You become a beacon of light in a world of distraction.
But don’t be discouraged if it doesn’t come easily. Presence is a practice. Start small. Choose one moment today—a conversation, a prayer, a meal—and give it your full attention. Feel the weight of it, the sacredness. Over time, these moments will add up, transforming not just your day, but your entire life.
Helminski reminds you: presence is where the mundane meets the divine. Live in it.
Insight 2: Overcoming the False Self
Imagine for a moment that you’re wearing a mask. It’s not a mask of celebration or disguise—it’s a mask you’ve crafted over years, piece by piece. It’s made from your insecurities, your fears, your need for validation. This is the false self, the part of you that clings to illusions of separation, pride, and self-importance. It’s the part of you that hides from vulnerability and avoids truth. Helminski calls it the false self, but you might recognize it by its other names: ego, nafs, or simply the self-centered “I.”
The false self whispers lies. It tells you that you’re alone, that you must prove your worth, that your value depends on how others perceive you. It convinces you to inflate yourself or to wallow in self-pity when life doesn’t go as planned. But here’s the truth: the false self isn’t real. It’s a construct, a defense mechanism built out of fear and ignorance.
The good news? You can overcome it. The journey to freedom begins with awareness. You must learn to recognize the false self in action. Notice when you feel the need to be right in an argument. Observe how you react when someone criticizes you. Pay attention to that fleeting sense of satisfaction when someone praises you. These are the fingerprints of the false self—always seeking validation, always on guard, always afraid.
“The false self is the result of existential angst; the soul feels unloved, unsafe, and unable to trust in Life.”
To dismantle the false self, you must shift your focus from external approval to internal alignment with the divine. In Islam, this process is often described as tazkiyah—purification of the soul. It’s not about suppressing your emotions or desires but transforming them. The anger that drives the false self can be redirected into passion for justice. The fear that fuels your ego can become reverence for God’s power and mercy.
Start by examining your intentions. Why do you do what you do? Are your actions driven by love for God or by a need to bolster your image? When you give charity, is it for the reward of the hereafter or for the recognition of your peers? This level of self-scrutiny is challenging, but it’s also liberating. Once you see the false self clearly, its power begins to fade.
Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) taught: “Die before you die.” This isn’t a call to despair but to transformation. To “die” in this sense means to let go of the ego, to surrender your illusions of control. When you do, you’ll discover your essential self—the part of you that is connected to God, rooted in love, and unshaken by life’s storms.
But this isn’t a one-time event; it’s a lifelong practice. The false self is persistent. It will try to reassert itself in moments of weakness. That’s why you must arm yourself with tools of mindfulness and surrender. Helminski points to practices like remembrance of God and self-vigilance as essential disciplines for dissolving the false self. Each time you say SubhanAllah (Glory be to God) with full awareness, you chip away at the ego’s foundation.
As you journey inward, you’ll notice a profound shift. Situations that once triggered you lose their power. Criticism no longer stings, and praise no longer inflates. You become less reactive and more reflective. Your actions flow not from fear or pride but from love and purpose. This is the state of the essential self, the part of you that reflects divine qualities like mercy, patience, and humility.
This transformation isn’t just for your benefit. When you overcome the false self, you create space for others to do the same. Your humility inspires humility in others. Your authenticity invites them to drop their own masks. In this way, your inner work becomes a gift to the world.
Insight 3: Polishing the Heart
Think of your heart as a mirror. Its original state is pure, capable of reflecting divine light and infinite beauty. But over time, it accumulates dust. This dust is subtle—it’s resentment, jealousy, heedlessness, arrogance. At first, you don’t notice it. The mirror still reflects, albeit dimly. But as the dust layers thicken, the light dims further. Eventually, you find yourself in darkness, disconnected from the divine, struggling to remember who you truly are.
This is the human condition. And yet, Kabir Helminski reminds you that the mirror of your heart can be polished. The divine light hasn’t disappeared—it’s just obscured. Your job is to remove the veils, to clear away the distortions, so your heart can once again shine brightly. It’s not a one-time effort, but a lifelong practice of refinement.
“To the extent that we polish the mirror of the heart, we become reflective and bright. We become lovers of this pure Spirit.”
How do you begin? First, by identifying the dust. Ask yourself: What is clouding my heart today? Is it a grudge you’ve been nursing? An unfulfilled desire you can’t let go of? A moment of arrogance you allowed to fester? Be honest. The process of polishing begins with awareness. You can’t remove what you refuse to acknowledge.
Islamic tradition offers powerful tools for this work. Remembrance of God is one of the most effective. When you repeat SubhanAllah (Glory be to God), Alhamdulillah (Praise be to God), or La ilaha illa Allah (There is no deity but God), you’re not just reciting words—you’re polishing. Each repetition is like a stroke of a cloth on a dusty mirror. The more intentional and present you are in this act, the more effective it becomes.
But polishing isn’t just about remembrance; it’s also about action. What you do shapes the state of your heart. Acts of forgiveness are like bursts of light, burning away the grime of resentment. When you let go of a grudge, you’re not just freeing the other person—you’re liberating your own heart. Similarly, acts of charity soften the heart, making it more receptive to divine grace. Even small, consistent acts—like a kind word or a silent prayer for someone—can have a transformative impact.
Then there’s the crucial work of intention. Every action you take should be checked at its root. Why are you doing what you’re doing? Is it for recognition, for ego, for worldly gain? Or is it for God alone? Purifying your intentions is one of the most difficult, yet essential, steps in polishing the heart. When your actions align with divine purpose, the heart responds, becoming clearer and more radiant.
Helminski warns that the heart doesn’t stay polished on its own. Life will test you. Anger, fear, and distraction will try to settle back in. That’s why you must remain vigilant. Think of it like tending to a fire. If you don’t keep feeding it with wood and air, it dies. Similarly, the heart needs constant care—through prayer, remembrance, reflection, and good deeds.
“The Day when neither wealth nor children will benefit, except one who comes to God with a sound heart.”
A polished heart isn’t just for your spiritual benefit—it transforms every aspect of your life. When your heart is clear, your interactions with others change. You’re less reactive, more compassionate. You see people not as obstacles or threats, but as souls on their own journeys. Your capacity to love deepens, and your ability to forgive becomes effortless.
And here’s the deeper truth: a polished heart doesn’t just reflect divine light—it magnifies it. The more you clear away the veils, the more the light shines through you, touching everyone you meet. You become a source of peace, guidance, and inspiration, a living testament to what’s possible when the heart is aligned with its Creator.
But remember, this work requires patience. There will be days when the dust seems to return faster than you can polish it. Don’t be discouraged. Every stroke of effort counts. Every moment of remembrance, every sincere act of love, is a step closer to your heart’s true potential.
This is your task: polish the mirror of your heart, and let the light of the divine shine through. It’s a practice of love, of surrender, of humility. And in that effort, you’ll discover the joy of becoming who you were always meant to be.
Insight 4: The Role of Community
You were not made to walk this path alone. You might think of spirituality as a solitary journey, something you must work out between you and God in the quiet of your own heart. But Kabir Helminski reminds you: spiritual growth flourishes within the embrace of a community. It’s within relationships—with friends, family, teachers, and fellow seekers—that your potential is fully realized. The lone traveler struggles to carry their burdens, but the traveler with companions shares the load.
Helminski emphasizes that collective worship and mutual support amplify spiritual transformation. You’ve experienced this, even if you didn’t recognize it at the time. Think of the last time you prayed with others—perhaps in a mosque, at a family gathering, or even in a small circle of friends. There was something there, wasn’t it? That’s the benefit of community: it multiplies blessings.
The Quran beautifully highlights this when God says, “Help one another in righteousness and piety, and do not help one another in sin and transgression”. Community is a space for that righteous support, a place where your strengths are amplified and your weaknesses are gently corrected.
But building a spiritual community isn’t just about gathering people. It’s about shared values and shared purpose. A true community inspires you to be better—not by competition or judgment, but by love. It’s the kind of place where your flaws are not ignored but addressed with mercy. It’s where you’re reminded to keep striving when you feel like giving up.
“The group or brotherhood exists to assist in the attraction, concentration, and transmission of subtle energies leading to new perceptions and personal transformation.”
Helminski points out that the process of growth is often messy. You’ll stumble. You’ll revert to old habits. But in a community, you have others to catch you, to remind you of your highest aspirations. Their presence holds you accountable, not with harshness, but with gentle encouragement. They see the best in you, even when you can’t see it yourself.
Think of Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) and his companions. They were more than friends—they were a community bound by love, shared struggle, and a common mission. They prayed together, served one another, and reminded each other to stay steadfast. When one faltered, the others lifted them up. When one excelled, the others rejoiced without envy. This is the blueprint for your own community.
But being part of a spiritual community also demands something of you. You can’t simply receive; you must also give. When you see a friend struggling with doubt, you must offer words of hope. When someone errs, you must correct them with kindness. Your presence must uplift others as much as theirs uplifts you. This mutual responsibility is what transforms a group of individuals into a true community.
And here’s the paradox: the more you give, the more you receive. When you serve others, your own heart expands. When you pray for someone else, your connection to God deepens. Community isn’t just a support system—it’s a mirror, reflecting your own growth and potential.
Of course, no community is perfect. You’ll encounter disagreements, misunderstandings, even hurt feelings. But these challenges are part of the process. They teach you patience, forgiveness, and humility. A true spiritual community doesn’t demand perfection; it demands sincerity. As long as everyone is striving together, the imperfections become opportunities for growth.
So seek out your community. If you don’t already have one, begin with the people around you. Join a study circle, attend congregational prayers, or simply gather a few friends to reflect on life and faith. The size doesn’t matter. What matters is the shared intention to grow closer to God.
Remember, you were not meant to carry this journey alone. In the company of others, your faith will grow stronger, your burdens will feel lighter, and your spirit will soar higher. Helminski reminds you: community is where the light of one soul ignites the light in another, until the darkness is dispelled, and together you walk into the brilliance of the divine.
Insight 5: The Alchemy of Love
Love is the greatest transformer. It moves mountains, mends hearts, and redefines the way you see the world. But you’ve likely misunderstood it. You’ve been told that love is about possession, desire, or getting something in return. You’ve been taught to measure love in terms of what it gives you. Kabir Helminski, however, reminds you that real love is the opposite. It’s not about taking—it’s about giving. Real love expects nothing. It’s a fire that burns away selfishness and ego, leaving only purity behind.
Helminski calls love the transformative force that moves you closer to your divine essence. It’s not a sentimental emotion but a spiritual reality that changes everything it touches. When love takes hold of your heart, it shifts your perspective. What once seemed unbearable now feels like a challenge you’re willing to face. What once seemed ordinary now glows with divine significance.
You see, love is alchemy. It takes the base elements of your soul—your flaws, your fears, your selfish desires—and transforms them into gold. But like any alchemical process, it requires heat. Love isn’t always easy. It demands that you let go of your ego, that you sacrifice comfort for the sake of something greater. When you love truly, you’ll find yourself acting in ways that surprise even you. You’ll forgive when you thought you couldn’t. You’ll give when you thought you had nothing left. And in those moments, you’ll feel closer to God than ever before.
“What we love, we will become.”
This isn’t just poetic—it’s a spiritual law. What you direct your love toward will shape your soul. If you love wealth, your heart will become hard and calculating. If you love power, your ego will swell and consume you. But if you love God, your heart will reflect His attributes—mercy, patience, generosity. This is the secret: you become what you adore. Love, then, is not just an emotion but a path. It’s a bridge between the human and the divine.
But here’s the challenge: love requires vulnerability. To love is to risk. It means opening your heart, knowing full well it might be broken. Helminski doesn’t sugarcoat this. He acknowledges that real love is often painful. When you truly love, you care deeply, and that care makes you susceptible to hurt. Yet it’s in that very vulnerability that your soul grows. The cracks in your heart let the divine light shine through.
Islam places profound emphasis on love. The Quran repeatedly speaks of God’s love for those who do good, who purify themselves, who trust in Him. Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) described love as the essence of faith, teaching that none of you truly believes until you love for your brother what you love for yourself. This love isn’t just a feeling; it’s an action. It’s a commitment to seek the best for others, even at a cost to yourself.
In your relationships, love becomes a spiritual practice. When you love your spouse, your children, your friends, you’re not just expressing affection—you’re participating in the divine. Your love mirrors God’s love for His creation. Each act of kindness, each moment of patience, each sacrifice you make for the sake of another is a reflection of that higher love.
And here’s the beauty: the more you love, the more you are loved. The world responds to your intention. When you give selflessly, you open yourself to receive blessings you couldn’t have imagined. This isn’t transactional—it’s the natural flow of divine energy. Love creates space within you, and God fills that space with His grace.
Helminski challenges you to let love guide your life. Begin with small acts. Call a friend you’ve lost touch with. Forgive someone who wronged you. Smile at a stranger. Each act is a spark that ignites the fire of love within you. Over time, this fire will grow, consuming your ego and illuminating your soul.
Remember, love isn’t weakness—it’s strength. It’s the force that drives the universe and connects you to its Creator. Let it transform you. Let it lead you. Love, as Helminski teaches, isn’t just a part of the spiritual path—it is the path.
Insight 6: Voluntary Attention
Your attention is your most precious asset. In a world designed to fracture it—endless notifications, ceaseless demands, a constant flood of information—it takes real courage to reclaim it. Kabir Helminski calls this “voluntary attention,” the deliberate and conscious focus of your mind. It is not just a tool for productivity; it is the gateway to spiritual growth. Where your attention goes, your energy follows. And where your energy flows, transformation begins.
Attention is the foundation of mindfulness. Without it, you drift through life, half-asleep, reacting to whatever pulls hardest at your senses. But when you direct your attention consciously, you awaken. You become present. You connect with the moment in a way that is profound and sacred.
Helminski likens attention to a light. When it’s scattered, it barely illuminates anything. But when focused, it cuts through darkness like a laser. Consider your daily life: how much of your attention is wasted on trivialities? How often are you truly present in your actions, whether it’s praying, working, or spending time with loved ones? The truth is, most of us are caught in a cycle of distraction, our attention fragmented and our energy drained.
To practice voluntary attention, start small. Choose a single task and give it your full focus. When you’re eating, taste the food. When you’re speaking with someone, listen—really listen—without planning your response or checking your phone. When you’re praying, immerse yourself in the words. At first, it will be difficult. Your mind will wander. That’s normal. Gently bring it back. Over time, this practice strengthens your ability to direct your attention, much like exercising a muscle.
“Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity,” Simone Weil once wrote. Helminski would agree. Giving your full attention is an act of love, whether it’s directed toward another person, a task, or God. When you give someone your attention, you’re saying: You matter. You are worthy of my time and focus. The same is true of your relationship with God. When you stand in prayer with your mind and heart fully engaged, you’re offering the most sincere act of devotion.
Voluntary attention is also a tool for self-mastery. It allows you to observe your thoughts and emotions without being controlled by them. When anger arises, you can notice it without acting on it. When fear whispers in your ear, you can acknowledge it without letting it dictate your actions. This is what Helminski refers to as “conscious presence.” It’s the ability to be aware of yourself and your surroundings without losing your center.
Islamic teachings emphasize the power of attention in worship. The Quran says, “Indeed, they who are apprehensive of their Lord… those who observe their prayer and guard their private parts, it is they who will inherit Paradise”. This requires focus, a heart and mind attuned to the divine. Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) exemplified this in his prayers, sometimes weeping with such intensity that his companions were moved to tears. His attention was unwavering, his presence complete.
But voluntary attention isn’t limited to worship. It applies to every aspect of your life. When you’re with your family, be with them. When you’re at work, immerse yourself in the task at hand. This doesn’t mean ignoring everything else—it means being fully engaged with the moment. Helminski reminds you that life itself is sacred, and attention is the key to unlocking its sanctity.
In a world that thrives on distraction, practicing voluntary attention is a revolutionary act. It allows you to reclaim your time, your energy, your purpose. It brings clarity to your actions, depth to your relationships, and meaning to your worship. Most importantly, it reconnects you with your Creator. When you focus on God, even for a moment, you align yourself with the divine. That single moment of attention can change everything.
Helminski challenges you to cultivate this skill, not as a discipline, but as a gift to yourself and to the world. Attention, after all, is more than a tool—it’s an expression of love. When you give it freely and fully, you reflect the divine light within you. And in that reflection, you’ll find your true self.
Insight 7: Surrendering to Divine Will
You’ve been conditioned to fight for control. From a young age, you’re taught to plan meticulously, anticipate outcomes, and manipulate circumstances to suit your desires. It’s no wonder that surrender feels counterintuitive, even frightening. But Kabir Helminski invites you to consider this truth: surrender is not defeat—it’s liberation. It’s the moment you stop wrestling with life and start flowing with it, aligning yourself with the divine will that has always been at work.
Surrendering to divine will doesn’t mean giving up or resigning yourself to passivity. It’s not about being a doormat or abandoning your responsibilities. Rather, it’s about trusting that there’s a greater plan, one far more intricate and wise than your limited perspective can comprehend. Helminski describes this state as “recognizing your own nothingness” in the face of God’s infinite wisdom and mercy. When you embrace this, you find a strength.
“They are transparent as if they are nothing, because they recognize their own nothingness.”
The first step in surrender is humility. You must acknowledge that you don’t have all the answers. The Quran repeatedly reminds you of this: “It may be that you dislike a thing and it is good for you, and it may be that you love a thing and it is bad for you. God knows, while you do not know”. When you internalize this, you begin to see life differently. What you once labeled as failure might be divine redirection. What you thought was loss might be preparation for something greater.
But how do you surrender in practice? Start by letting go of outcomes. When you make an effort—whether in your work, relationships, or worship—detach yourself from the result. Do your best, then trust God with the rest. This doesn’t mean neglecting diligence or ambition. It means releasing the need to control every variable. Recognize that the outcome is in God’s hands, not yours.
Prayer is another powerful act of surrender. When you raise your hands in supplication, you’re not just asking for what you want—you’re acknowledging your dependence on God. You’re saying, “I can’t do this alone. Guide me. Strengthen me. Help me align with Your will.” Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) modeled this beautifully in the most difficult moments of his life. In the Battle of Badr, facing an enemy far stronger in number, he prayed with complete reliance, saying, “O God, fulfill what You promised me. O God, grant me what You promised me.” His surrender didn’t weaken him; it fortified him.
Surrender also means accepting life as it comes. When challenges arise, resist the urge to ask, “Why me?” Instead, ask, “What does God want me to learn from this?” Every hardship is an opportunity for growth, a chance to purify your heart and deepen your trust. Helminski emphasizes that surrender transforms suffering. When you see pain as part of a divine plan, it loses its sting. It becomes a teacher, not an enemy.
Surrendering to divine will also impacts your relationships. It frees you from the need to control others. Instead of trying to mold people to your expectations, you accept them as they are, trusting that God is guiding them just as He’s guiding you. This shift brings peace and harmony, replacing frustration with compassion.
Most importantly, surrender opens the door to inner peace. Imagine carrying a heavy load, struggling under its weight. Now imagine someone strong and trustworthy offering to carry it for you. That’s what surrender feels like. When you hand your burdens to God, you’re no longer weighed down by worry and fear. You move through life with a lightness, knowing you’re supported by a force far greater than yourself.
This doesn’t mean surrender is easy. Your ego will resist. It will tell you that you need to control, to strive, to force outcomes. But every time you choose surrender, you weaken the ego’s grip. Over time, you’ll find that surrender isn’t just a practice—it’s a state of being. It’s living with the awareness that everything, from the smallest moment to the grandest event, is part of a divine tapestry.
Surrender, as Helminski teaches, is the ultimate act of faith. It’s not a loss of power; it’s the rediscovery of true power—the kind that comes from aligning with the One who holds the heavens and the earth. When you surrender, you’re not giving up; you’re stepping into the flow of divine grace, where everything is exactly as it should be.
Living Presence offers a profound call to integrate spirituality into everyday life. Helminski’s blend of practical guidance, poetic wisdom, and deep reverence for tradition makes the book a transformative resource. It inspires readers to embody mindfulness, reconnect with their essential self, and live in harmony with the divine.